Hello everyone! Welcome to my response of a review. Normally I don't do these type of things, but this review was so far left field, I *just* had to respond. Join us as we point out, what's really wrong! --Tory >Review of Project Sailor Earth Tory: No, that's Project: Sailor Earth. Moshi: Sheesh! It's already starting out wrong! Ami: Calm yourself, Mo-chan. It has just started. Moshi: And that's what's freaking me out! >Disclaimer: These opinions are the opinions of SailorRiven (that >would be me, Willow), and if you have a problem with this review, >deal with it. Usagi: Ano. Wouldn't that defeat the purpose of it being a review? Rei: [eyebrow twitch] What kind of review is this?! Makoto: The kind you just have to deal with! Tory: Disclaimer: These opinions are the opinions of Tory (that would be me), and if you have a problem with this response. SHOVE IT! Girls: Ooooh! >No really, feel free to flame me, but don't think I actually care. Tory: Then this shouldn't bother you. >These are my opinions, I'm not trying to force them on anyone, they're >just my opinions. Usagi: Whew! Thank goodness. For a second I was *really* starting to worry! Tory: Hey, these are my opinions too! >You don't have to have the same opinions, if you do that's cool, if >you don't that's cool too, but don't be flaming me. Actually, scratch >that: do flame me Rei: [grinning while holding henshin wand] Others: REI-CHAN, NO! Rei: [grumbling under her breath.] >if you feel so inclined, but I won't mind. By the way, I'm sorry if >it seems I'm being too harsh on this review. Ami: I can feel the love in the room. Makoto: That's just the heater kicking in. Rei: Or flaming death creeping up on Tory. Tory: Meep! >I really think this is an excellent fanfic, better than mine even >in some aspects. I'm just nitpicking about things that just... >were annoying. Tory: (a la Duke nukem) Damn, I'm good! Minako: Ah, so it was better, but yet annoying. Rei: Anyone else confused yet? Senshi: HAI! Rei: Carry on! >Gomen. Okay, on to the review. Minako: Shouldn't that be slaughter? Moshi: On to the bitch session is more better. Tory: I'll let you slide with that one, Mo-chan. Moshi: [big grin] >Site: Project: Sailor Earth Moshi: That's me! That's me! >Site's Creator: Tory Brown Tory: That's me! That's me! >Reviewer: Willow, in the form of Sailors Lilith and Solar Makoto: Schizophrenic!? Minako: Multiple personalities! [Everyone looks at Moshi] Moshi: Stop looking at me. >Sailor Solar: *holding up a sign that says "applause"* Thank you, >thank you very much! > Hotaru: [outside of theater] I wasn't clapping. Were you, Michiru-mama? Michiru: [outside of theater] Hmm. No. >Sailor Lilith: Yoake-chan, we're supposed to do a review, not a >ticker-tape parade. > >Solar: Sorry. *puts down the sign* Now what was it that we were >supposed to do...oh YAH! Do a review! Rei: Even Usagi isn't this ditzy. Usagi: HEY! Tory: The humor segment, ladies and gents. [Crickets chirp] >Lilith: Okay then, let's go. My first impressions of this page were... >ooh, an image map! Ami: Image map?! How long ago was *that* on the first page! Tory: When I was in school... last year. >And fast loading time too, which is a good thing considering Willow's >ancient modem. Tory: Now that I admit is what I try to do. Aim for quick loading! >Solar: And aforementioned image map actually works too, and there are >text links in case your browser doesn't support that kind of thing. >Nice picture of Moshi on the image map. Moshi: [batting eyelashes and smiling] Makoto: Oh quit it. >Lilith: Although it's an edited pic, obviously one of Sailormoon. >I hate edited pics. Tory: So friggin what?! The person who did that pic for me took a lot of time out HER SCHEDULE to create that for me! Minako: Now breathe... >And people, if you're going to do one of those >things, don't edit a pic of 'neechan. It's really obvious if you do. Usagi: I have a sister?! WHERE?! [Looks around wildly] Moshi: [Tries to calm Usagi down] Makoto: What the hell? She's giving orders now?! Minako: First it's a review and now it's an order! >Solar: All very true. Okay, characters page time! Or maybe that's >character, singular. Ami: Watch us be amazed by the impressive English skills! All: oooohhhh. [Amazed looks] >Lilith: Yep, the character being Takanera Moshi, Sailor Earth. Moshi: Or Sailorearth, Seera Aasu...what have you. Ami: I thought I would be doing the nitpicking. Moshi: Well, the review isn't talking about you! >Lucky her, I wish I had a fanfiction all to myself. Moshi: ... Makoto: Say even one word and I'll strike you down! [Pulls out henshin wand] Moshi: Gomen! >Solar: Nice profile. Goes into detail about her character, although Rei: There's always an 'although!' >the edited pic on this page is sloppily edited. Tory: Is this all you people focus on? Pics!? Ami: Some are visual and others well...they read. >Lilith: Overall, a good profile. Next! > Tory: Gee, such a great review on the profile! Rei: That explained NOTHING. Makoto: Yeah, all they did was whine about the picture! Moshi: I wonder what part of the profile did they like?! Minako: It doesn't matter, they're just out to slay you. Moshi: I'm SICK of dying! >Solar: The fanfic itself. It's a good fic, with a developed storyline Tory: MUHAHAHAHAHAHAR! Moshi: **sweatdrop** Rei: We're going to chain you to the floor if you keep this up. Tory: Meep! >and lots of twists in the plot and all. I liked the part where Moshi >thought she was Rei, and all that stuff happened. Minako: Hear that? Stuff happened. Never mind the fact that Moshi was prancing around dressed as Sailormars. Moshi: Speaking of which, those heels were killers! How do you do that?! Rei: It takes skill. Others: Rei-chan kowai... >Lilith: One thing that really really annoyed me, though, is the constant >use of Japanese. Ami: Watakushitatchi wa Nippon-jin desu! (We are Japanese) Tory: Ami-chan, don't start. >Solar: More like overuse. Why the heck is it necessary to say "neko" instead >of cat, or something like "I missed minna" when you mean "I missed you all"? Tory: Hmm, to give it a Japanese feel, perhaps? Moshi: DAMMIT! Because I *FELT* like it! Ami: Mo-chan, the language. Moshi: Gomen nasai, Ami-chan. Others: TOO MUCH JAPANESE! *THWACK* Moshi: ITAI! Er..OUCHIE! >Lilith: Yeah...*reads further into fic* Whoa. How about extreme overuse? Tory: Whoa! How about extreme retardedness! Others: TORY! Tory: Okay, that was wrong...I'm sorry. Usagi: [mutters] not... >I'm Japanese and I can't even tell what they're talking about here! Rei: Anyone smell the odor of pants burning? Makoto: I'll say. Where's the air freshner?! Minako: You sure Rei-chan didn't have anything to do with it? Rei: [innocent expression] >Solar: That's what the Japanese dictionary is for, Tsukiko-chan. Although >switching from the fic to the dictionary is difficult, you have to go back, >then forward, then back, then forward... *Solar gets dizzy* Vertigo. Tory: Wow, this review is *old* All Japanese words have translations at the end of the chapter now! >Lilith: Okay, Solar... By the way, why do the characters shorten each others' >names to only one syllable? Like Mo-chan, and Moshi calling Mamoru "Ru-chan"? Tory: [blinks in disbelief] Moshi: BECAUSE MY NICKNAME IS MO-CHAN! Minako: Not by this. Mo-chan and Moshi are two separate people!! Usagi: Kami-sama! Two Moshis?! EEP! All: AAAAHHHHHHH! Makoto: Mosite isn't in this! Mosite: [outside of theater] And you won't catch me in it either! Tory: The great irony in this is; it's supposed to be the one syllable! Ami: Never mind, Tory. It went over their heads. Minako: [making noises of a Jet] >Why the heck Moshi: --is this even called a review!? Wouldn't reasons to join the I-HATE-MOSHI club work better?! >does she call him Ru-chan? Tory: Oh forget it. I explained that already! >Even Usagi doesn't use that much familiarity with him! Usagi: Shows you she doesn't know THAT much. Others: USAGI! Usagi: Hehehe. Gomen, gomen! >It makes you wonder the relationship between Moshi and Mamoru... Tory: No, it makes me wonder about your intelligence. Usagi: [SNAPS!] NANI?! Hoshi: [outside of theater] NNNNNAAANNNNIIII!!!???? O.O Mamoru: [outside of theater] o.O;; *THUD* Moshi: It's not like that! HENTAI! Ru-chan is my brother! Rei: Oh right, like Usagi would let some other girl move in with her boyfriend. And I'm the Queen of Dance. >Solar: And who the heck is Gi-chan? Chibiusa: [outside of theater] It's me, BAKA! Usagi: Chibiusa! Chibiusa: [outside of theater] Hehehe, Gomen! >Oh, short for Usagi. Why couldn't they >just call her Usa-chan? Minako: Because, Miko calls her Gi-chan, not Usa-chan! Tory: AND IT WAS CHIBIUSA! Rei: It's useless. The joke is lost between those two. Ami: Don't worry, Tory. We understood! Makoto: The term, 'creative expression' gets lost somewhere too. > And Mi-chan, for Miko? And don't you think it's ironic that Usagi: --People can be this stupid. Tory: USAGI!! Usagi: GOMEN! >they shortened Chibi-Moshi's name to Shi-chan? Shi: [outside of theater] Uh, excuse me. That's CHIBIMO! Moshi: Darn tootin! Tory: How the hell is that ironic?! Minako: It's better than having two Mo-chans running around! Ami: I think it was changed to Shi because Shi was taller than Moshi when she visited! >Lilith: Why's that ironic? Senshi: [looks at Tory] Tory: Coincidence! >Solar: She's the senshi of life, right? Shi means death. Shi: [outside of theater] When in the world did THAT happen?! Tory: Oh now that's just plain WRONG. Makoto: I think everyone knows Shi means death. Moshi: That and the number 4! Usagi: Tory even explained it in the story. Rei: Besides, Shi isn't the Senshi of life! Minako: True, she's the future Tuxedo Kamen! Ami: Yet another aspect lost with these two. >Lilith: Ohh. Weird. Also, another thing I noticed is this: since when do >people spit blood clots out their mouth and nose if their arm gets cut off? Moshi: If you'd got a Magic Tiara in the ribs and stomach, you'd spit blood too. Usagi: Heheh, Gomen about that. Moshi: No biggie. You did what you had to do. >Solar: Eew. Yeah, you're right about that. The excessive spitting of >blood clots is almost as bad as the excessive Japanese. Rei: Right up there with the excessive stupidity. Others: REI! Rei: Oh shush. Moshi: Man, let me run my sword through you. See if you don't spit blood or not. Tory: Down, Moshi! >Lilith: And what's up with the Moshi/Hoshi dialogue on the phone? It >suddenly goes to some weird format with "Moshi: 'Hi.' Hoshi: 'Hi.'" and >stuff like that. Tory: File corruption! I swear! When I FTP'd a large amount was lost! Rei: Shows you what happens when you let Usagi near your computer! Usagi: REI-CHAN! Ami: I'm still trying to get Tetris out of my Mercury computer! Usagi: [turns bright red] >Solar: Like a script almost, but if it was a script, it's not in the right >format. I don't know what was up there. Makoto: Now you're a script writer! I swear, these Senshi are so perfect! Minako: [doofy voice] I want to be like them when I power up! Heeyuh! >Lilith: Something else weird. Anyway, there's an incontinuity I found. >Okay, in the fic Sailormoon transforms into her super form, and Tory herself >says that this takes place in between Super and SuperS, right? Tory: I said that? [Pulls out notebook] Minako: No, you said during S. Moshi: I was in the future at SuperS! >Solar: Right. All: WRONG! Moshi: Very F--- Makoto: [glares at Moshi] Moshi: --riggin wrong! >But then, Moshi leaves for the future, and she comes back >and they say that while she was gone, SMS and SMSuperS happened while >she was gone. Minako: Uh, no we didn't. Tory: That would rip the fourth wall to pieces! Ami: Correction. SuperS and Stars happened while she was gone! Usagi: Plus it sounds retarded. "Oh Mo-chan, while you were gone, we've all changed to another season!" Rei: Geez, she wasn't even around for SuperS to start! Moshi: Or for it to end! Tory: Sheesh, she may have been there, what? 3 episodes!? Moshi: Two. Tory: Whatever! >Lilith: And if it's between S and SS, then the Outers should be there >right? But they're not! Tory: ARGH! IT WAS DURING S! NOT BETWEEN S AND SS!!! Moshi: Ahh! Down, Tory! Usagi: They are, you just didn't see them. Ami: Ahh, this was before you saw the rest of the series, ne? Tory: Correct. I'd rather omit than grossly write them out of character. Haruka: [outside theater] Besides, we wouldn't stand for it! >Solar: Oops. And there's switching between the manga and the anime, like >in the future when they're in their Star forms, but they use some of the >attacks that are only in the anime. Tory: Yet another thing overlooked. I said I USED MANGA ATTACKS because I didn't want to CREATE ANY NEW ONES! Rei: It was said and they missed. Their loss. Usagi: I'm sure Chronos Typhon would be better than Pluto Clock Attack. Setsuna: [outside of theater] NANI?! O.o;; Minako: Oh gross, Usagi-chan! >Lilith: Hey, another one: Nova is supposedly out to avenge Galaxia's death? >Um...she didn't die in the anime. Just the manga. Makoto: And now the manga experts. Good night everyone! Tory: When in the bloody heck did I say Galaxia-sama died? Galaxia: [outside of theater] I'm dead!? NANI?! Ami: Kami-sama! Nova only THINKS that Galaxia is dead! Moshi: Let's just chalk this up to something else that's gone over their heads. >Solar: But look kids, the rest of it still follows the anime continuity! Tory: Look kids, people who can't take contextual clues! Moshi: Okay, Tory. Now that was wrong. Tory: Sorry. Moshi: Wish I'd thought of it. >Lilith; Right. But other than that it's a really good fic! Really! It's >good, except confusing and a little not continuous sometimes. Rei: So it's a good story, but it sucks. MAKE UP YOUR MINDS! Minako: Oh, that's supposed to make Tory feel better after you basically called her dumb?! Tory: A kick in the pants would be less painful. >Solar: Next, the images. *goes to images section* Hey, nifty. I like the >window popup things that come up whenever you click an image. Usagi: And the pain continues... Moshi: Amazing thing that Java script. >Lilith: These images - most of them anyway - are well-edited and/or drawn. >I'm just still annoyed over the edited Usagi thing... Usagi: What is the fascination with the gallery?! It's just pictures! You don't hear me complaining, do you?! >and did you notice on the card of Moshi with the kitten it says "Moon >Princess" below her? Tory: Oh yes, I'm such a damn idiot that I let that fly by. Ami: [sighs] Makoto: Oh boy. Moshi: SO WHAT!? SOMEONE MADE THAT FOR HER AND TOOK TIME TO DO IT! YOU HEARTLESS FOOLS! Rei: You need to quit watching gaijin tv. Moshi: Stuff it, Rei-chan. >Solar: Very weird. Okay, we're done here. Anything at all we haven't >covered yet, Lilith? Tory: Besides my corpse? Uh nope. Moshi: Or the shaddered remains of my self-esteem? Hell no. Others: MOSHI! Mamoru: [outside of theater] Midget... Moshi: Gomen, Ru-chan! >Lilith: Nope, I think that's it. Ami: Now *THAT'S* a good one! [Everyone looks at Ami in shock] Ami: Sorry. Angst moment. >Solar: Okay, overall impression. A good site. Sorry if we're being too >critical, Tory: Apology NOT FRIGGIN accepted! Moshi: DAMN STRAIGHT! [A rose comes flying from outside and hits Moshi in the head] Moshi: Itai! *THUD* All: ROSE TO DA HEAD! Michiru: [outside of theater] Nice shot, Mamoru-san. Mamoru: [outside of theater] Arigato! Tory: HEY! Anymore from you guys and you come in here! Others: [outside of theater] .... >but that's just Willow nitpicking again. Rei: There is a difference between C&C and plain nitpicking. This is the latter. Ami: Did they ever email you? Tory: Nope, not even a 'you suck' Makoto: Isn't this the same person who wanted to use Moshi in a storyline? Tory: No, Mako-chan. That was Sailor Myst. [pause] Usagi: Nah, couldn't be! >Lilith: Not the best fanfic, Tory: And I just bet yours is of epic proportions. Ami: You know you'd lose. Tory: It'll be a buck I'm happy to part with. >mind you, but good anyway. What do you think, Yoake, a 2? Or a 3? Moshi: Or a nice big fu--MRUGHPH! Makoto: DON'T EVEN GO THERE! Minako: You'd think a rose to the head would stop her, but nooooo! >Solar: 2.5. Are we allowed to rate it that? Minako: Now you're licensed critics?! What do you two DON'T do?! >Lilith: Creative expression. I think 2.5 is the appropriate rating. >Good, but not great. Tory: Good, not great. Good but annoying?! Now I'm confused. Ami: Good. Confused is good. It lessens the pain. >Solar: Okay, it's a 2.5 then. See you next time, when some other senshi >review some other site! Usagi: And mindlessly grind it into dust because you're jealous you didn't get the idea first. >Solar and Lilith: Bye! All: JA NE! Tory: Ok, girls. Impressions? Ami-chan? Ami: I think they should have taken time to read into it a bit more. Afterall, the site has changed since *this* supposed review. Tory: [nods] Minako-chan? Minako: Too many things were lost in translation. Some jokes just 'flew' over their heads. Tory: True, true. Usagi-chan? Usagi: I'm still trying to figure out who Mo-chan AND Moshi is. Aren't they the same person? Moshi: Yes, I am. Tory: [snickers] Mo-chan? Moshi: What I have to say, can't be said in public. So I choose to keep it to myself. Tory: Uh okay. I bet in involves a lot of four lettered words. Moshi: You betcha! Tory: Okay, Mako-chan? Makoto: I think that's Sailor Myst out for revenge! [All start cracking up laughing] Tory: Okay, Rei-chan? Rei: I still say you should have let me flame them. Tory: No, the insurance premimum is already sky high because of you. Rei: Drat! Girls: Tory? Tory: Well, I think this was a basic bitching session and they were a bit peeved at me for some freakish reason that I don't understand. The End. And now for Tory's Rant... Senshi: YAY! Obviously they couldn't understand what was going on. I thought I had did to my best ability at THAT present time to make sure that no one would be confused. It was also obvious that it was before the beginning of the Arc series. There's more Outer senshi action in that. They focused too much on the pic gallery instead of the fanfic itself. And when they finally did, they only nitpicked instead of offering ideas on how the situation could be rectified. Points that were just wrong: Excessive Blood: Wouldn't you spurt blood from your mouth if you got stabbed in the stomach? Moshi was rammed clean through by Mosite's sword and she BLED! I mean I was trying to keep it real. How about I go around running people with swords just to test it out. Hmm? Excessive Japanese: Moshi is Japanese, so isn't it ideal that she speak it as well? Or is Arigato just too hard on the poor brain? All chapters have translations at the bottom. I don't declare myself a proffecient speaker of Japanese, but I can certainly understand Minna and Neko. Shi is NOT the senshi of life: I'm still trying to figure out where in the hell did I say that! I have NEVER said, nor will I EVER say that Shi is the senshi of life. Miko is the future Senshi of life! Shi's the future Tuxedo Kamen for pete's sake!. Was the bright yellow tux not enough of a clue?! I'm sure that was discussed in the chapter of Showdown. It was even exclaimed, but they even missed that. "What the hell!?" Cyber Earth sputtered. "She's Tuxedo Kamen-sama?!" So what if Moshi uses one syllables: That was the point of the joke. Gi-chan is not Usagi: Gi-chan was what Miko called Chibiusa. ONLY BECAUSE CHIBIUSA CALLED HER MI-CHAN! When in the hell did they become the experts on nicknaming? Galaxia is not dead: I have seen SailorStars. Nova only THINKS that Galaxia is dead because she hadn't heard from her in while. Come on people, make the mental connection. Time line: I realize that some parts of it does become a bit skewered. I'm a grown woman and I admit to this fault. Which is why PSE is under renovation, just to clear up those fuzzy lines. Since the two Einsteins couldn't figure it out.. Pictures sloppy: Do I actually care? If someone makes a picture for me, I'll gladly put it in the gallery. Even if it's 'sloppily edited' If the pictures offend them that much, couldn't they've just made some better ones? I just appreciate the fact that someone CARES enough about my story to attempt to make a picture. Time Line Explanation: BSSMSuper: Moshi shows up, and then goes to the future (PSE 1-16) BSSMSuperS: Moshi's still in the future. (PSE 16) BSSMSailorStars: Moshi's still in the future. (PSE 17) End of PSE/ The Chronicles: Moshi returns AFTER the end of Stars. (PSE 18-22, ARC 1-present ARC) To simply put it: Moshi appeared BRIEFLY during S, went to the future and returned AFTER Stars. It's still ONE YEAR because the time from S to SailorStars is ONE YEAR! Somehow, I think they're equating S and SS as two years, when in fact it's one, because Usagi's 15 through both! Let's do the math! BSSM-BSSMR = Usagi-chan is 14 BSSMS-BSSMSS = Usagi-chan is 15 BSSMSailorStars = Usagi-chan is 16 Subtract 14 from 15 and you GET ONE! I'm not a naturally evil person, but this review was so off base it was retarded. If this response is a bit too critical. I don't care. Deal with it. And that's just *my* opinion.